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I had a good laugh when I saw this topic. Not because of the requirements; just because it is such obvious flamebait.
Actually, when I first read it, I thought the person who originated the topic had been assigned to create a language, rather than simply choose one, for his company's project. If you read the post carefully, it's ambiguous... and judging from Cliff's (the editor's) remarks, he might have read it that way too.
I like this, though:
I have already looked at C++, Java, C++, C#, Eiffel, and even VB.net
I am still trying to figure out what the difference is between these languages. ;)
He should have written:
I have already looked at Lutheranism, Catholicism, Lutheranism, Episcopalianism, Puritanism, and even Mormonism
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Slashdot looks for the perfect language